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Stoke’s Guide to the Apocalypse
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What to expect in Munich.
Well you’re nearly here.
We’ve been here for a few days now, setting things up and drinking a few preliminary Bavarian beers (we need the extra training given that we are the German beer drinking experts) and let me tell you, it’s über beautiful.
And soon you will be here to see it all yourself! And I bet you’re thinking “what the pretzel is going to be there when we arrive?”.
That’s what I want to tell you now…
Checking In.
- Arrive, follow the directions to get here, get off the bus and walk to the back left hand corner of the campsite (look out for the Stoke Travel signs).
- Check in with our lovely receptionists. If you have a print out of your booking confirmation, great, but all you need to know to check in is your last name, which most of you should have no problem recalling…. for now.
- If you have an outstanding balance, you need to bring cash with you, pretty please.
- We take your passport from you at check in and lock it in our safe, that way you definitely cannot lose it.
- If you want to drink our beers, it costs 5 euros a day for as many as you want (the same beers are 2.50 each in the campsite shop).
- Put your gear in your tent and join the party!
Oktoberfest?
- If you arrive in time you can take one of our shuttle buses directly to the beer halls. Never fear if you arrive later, however, as the public transport system here is very German (efficient, on time, fast, practical) the trip from campsite to beer halls won’t take you longer than half an hour.
- We have regular shuttles going in to the beer halls from the early morning until lunch time and returning from the afternoon until the evening.
- You cannot order food or drink unless you are at a table. If all the tables are full you make new friends by joining people with space, it could be the most fun thing about the whole festival.
- In the beer halls a litre of beer costs 10 euros (well 8 something plus tip), and the food is amazing, though a little costly (pretzels, chicken and pork knuckles are our faves).
- Always keep an eye on your pals. While the aim of the game is to get merry, the beer is extremely strong and no one wants to get in trouble. If they’re getting too loose, force a water on them.
- If you’re having too much fun and don’t want to get the shuttle back to camp, you goddamn don’t have to. We’ll give you detailed public transport instructions, or a taxi is 20 euros (make sure it’s a legal one to stay safe), so you can come back whenever you please.
- There is more to Oktoberfest than just beer. There is the food, and rides, and cultural events, it’s a family affair as well as one where people are smooching strangers, there are even wine tents and an archery competition. It’s super sweet.
Stoketoberfest.
- When you are in the camp we have plenty of beers for you to drink. We have to stop serving beer at eleven (definitely not our rule, but if we break it the campsite kicks us out), but we’ll try and stretch that for you.
- Every second night we run a BBQ dinner from 5 until 10pm. Get your ticket from reception and eat whenever you please.
- There are plenty of eating options at the campsite for any other times you are hungry, as well as restaurants and fast food joints in the surrounding suburb (and a sweet pizza delivery joint).
- Breakfast will be cooked every morning from an hour before the first bus departs until the last bus leaves (usually around 11am).
- The merchandise tent not only dispenses sweet t-shirts (10 euros) and hooded jumpers/sweatshirts (25 euros) but also triples as our question tent (from toilet location inquiries to the meaning of life) and DJ booth (make a request, if we got it, you got it).
- To shower you need a one euro token for five minutes of hot water, which are available at both the campground’s reception and Stoke Travel’s reception. The amenities (showers, toilets, etc) are provided by Campingplatz öbermenzing, not Stoke Travel, we would never charge you to look beautiful and smell delicious.
And that’s about it for now, there will be more information coming soon, as well as a printable sheet with important addresses and contact details (so you can drunkenly make your way home if you get lost).
And don’t forget to email us with your tent preferences, lest you not get the tents you desire…
Stoke Travel – wunderbar!
Some Oktoberfest Information Part One.
This is the first in a non-sequential series of blog entries about things we think will be important for y’all to know with the coming Oktoberfest. Non-sequential in that we’re not going to start with the things which we think are most important and work down, nor will we be working in the other direction. Just the things we think are important as they come to us, ‘tis all…
So let’s strap on our lederhosen and dive right on in.
The Weather.
This time of the year we should expect it to start getting a little chilly. Let me tell you a story about last year, once upon a time last year we had one storm, days when we were swimming in bikinis, nights so cold that witches teets froze solid, a few days of drizzle and plenty of sunshine.
What does Stoke Travel provide?
- Accommodation in two or three person tents (two people go in a two person and three in a three person, sounds obvious but you’d be surprised).
- A sleeping mat and a sleeping bag (the sleeping bags are totally warm but if you are a cold little chicken think about packing a hot water bottle for the chillier nights).
- Hot breakfast with coffee every single morning.
- A BBQ dinner every second night.
- Coach transfers to and from the beer halls everyday.
- Sweet Stoke Travel guides on each coach.
- One heck of a party either in the beer halls or back at our camp.
- For five euros extra beer and sangria in our camp.
What doesn’t Stoke Travel provide?
- Our sweet merchandise, but it doesn’t cost you much to buy it…
- Lunch ever and dinner every other day.
- Beer in the beer halls.
- And that’s it.
We think you should pack.
- Something warm and comfortable to sleep in (think PJs or tracksuit pants).
- Something awesome to party in (because that’s how you get the smooches).
- Something to swim in (you never know).
- Shoes and socks (this isn’t Bermuda).
- A camera (you’re not remembering a thing so you better document it).
- Condoms (you know what they say about being safe rather than sorry).
- A little torch so you can see the interior your tent at night (even though you’ll probably be cross eyed).
- A pillow (because it is more comfortable when you’re trying to snooze).
- Gifts for your lovely Stoke Travel staff.
And that’s it for this installment ladies and gremlins, we’ll be posting more over the coming days, like what to expect at the festival, what we’ll be wearing, and so on.
STOKE TRAVEL – We put the pests in Oktoberfest.
How the Bloody Hell do we get to Stoke Travel in Munich?
Good question, a very important question, and one that is quite easily answered.
There is a wonderful website with a beautiful trip planner that gets you from anywhere in Munich to us, but if you’re coming from Hauptbahnhoff (Munich central railway station) or the airport we’re going to give you instructions below, because we love you…
Your destination is Campingplatz Obermenzing, once you get there you walk through the campsite to the rear left hand corner. If anyone from Germany questions your intentions you have to say “Ich bin hier mit Stoke reisen Sie große, schöne Bratwurst”.
Now for the meaty stuff.
Coming from the airport.
- Get off the plane, collect your bags. If your bags aren’t there don’t worry you can wear my clothes.
- Get on the Metro, which in Munich is called the S Bahn.
- You want to take the line S1 in the direction of Neufahrn.
- When the train arrives at Neufahrn stay on it because it continues to Laim.
- Get off at Laim and change to the line S2.
- Take the S2 to Untermenzing.
- At Untermenzing get off the train and catch the 164 bus in the direction of Augustenfelder Straße.
- About 5 minutes later you’ll arrive at Campingplatz Obermenzing.
The entire trip will take you about an hour, which really is nothing when you think about how much fun we’re going to have!
Coming from Hauptbahnhoff (Central Station).
- Find the metro line S2.
- Take it to Untermenzing.
- At Untermenzing get off the train and catch the 164 bus in the direction of Augustenfelder Straße.
- About 5 minutes later you’ll arrive at Campingplatz Obermenzing.
See how easy it all is? This trip will take you about 20 minutes, which is about as long as it will take you to drink a litre of beer at the festival if you are really excited and hell bent on getting wasted.
And that’s all you need to know. We can’t wait to meet you all and drink a thousand beers with you, by golly it’s going to be a whale of a time!
San Seb Surf Camp: And So It Begins…
The first bunch of legends to visit Surf Camp
June 1st 2011 – a magnificent day when a bunch of dubious humans with pickled livers gathered together to mark the beginning of Stoke’s San Sebastian summer madness.
In one corner, the House on the Hill team – a suspiciously handsome bunch with a taste for pleasure and a head for madness. In the next, the San Seb Surf Camp crew – a group of filthy gypsies with a penchant for salt water and barbecued eggs. Overseeing the conglomeration – Coach Gravy, a dangerously tall individual with a naughty twinkle in his gorgeous green eyes.
A reconnaissance mission was called for, so in the name of research and fine customer service, the mighty team hit the bars of San Sebastian, sampling all manner of alcohol to ensure our future guests/friends would partake in simply the best concoctions. Sampling their future hangovers was slightly less fun, and had we awoken to find a tiger in the bathroom, no one would have been surprised.
The San Seb Surf Camp crew bid their House on the Hill pals farewell and headed to the lush green hills and breaking waves of Zarautz, a mere 15 minutes up the highway and a place where birds actually chirped and bronzed nude men and women strolled along the shorefront. While they navigated a giant shipping container chock full of surfboards, tents, sleeping bags and mats, into place, the House on the Hill team hit the pavements of San Sebastian, information flyers clutched in their sweaty paws. Fancy a pintxos tour of the old town? These sexy devils are there to guide and feed you delicious bite sized bursts of goodness. Keen to inflict some liver damage yourself? They know the best bars, the most deliciously demonic drinks and can even make the surliest of doormen smile. Hit up info@stoketravel.com if you want to get in touch with them, or if you’re in San Seb, just keep your eye out for the guys in the pink tutus, wearing rollerblades and lycra green mesh muscle shirts.
Meanwhile, back at Surf Camp a construction was underway and with 20 frothing new customers soon to arrive, the Surf Camp crew were hard at work putting together a haven of hedonistic fun. As the final tent peg was determinedly driven into the ground the Stoke bus pulled up, brewskis were popped open and a welcoming surf check was performed. That night, we ate, drank and were merry.
The morning ushered in some sweet little waves and a eager bunch of Germans, Dutch, Swiss, British, American and Australians headed down to the beach, their bellies full of fresh coffee and eggs, a board under one arm and a chorizo salad bocadillo under the other. After a day of blue skies, surfing and beach games they headed back up, their skin slightly pink and their stoke fully buzzed.
Munching on hot popcorn and sipping some chilled beers, our internationally flavoured bunch watched a blood-orange sun set before chowing down on nachos and chilli corn and then the fun began in earnest. A new drinking game was created, entitled “Maria’s Biscuit”, which managed to seamlessly break through both language barriers and sobriety.
With several hundred beers under our belts, we wandered into the town of Zarautz to check out the local music festival. Toes sufficiently tapped, kidneys sufficiently loaded, our surf rats tumbled into bed happy and exhausted. What a brilliant bunch of people to set the tone for what is guaranteed to be a glorious summer.
And thus ends the first weekend at the San Sebastian surf camp… Check out our website for more info on how you can join in the festivities.
Check it all out in VIVID VIDEO
What’s It FEEL Like to Run with those Big Hairy Death Machines?
Aside from craploads of drinking, sangria tossing and a freakish lack of sleep, obviously the highlight of San Fermin is running with the bulls. Last year, I was so stoked to be able to run with my brother and fiancé. We got there early and started at the bottom of the run. It was a long two hour wait until the starting time and as the kick off to the bulls’ release approached, the crowd started to swell and move up the run. My brother Buddha has done it a stack of times, and he led us to a spot just after the infamous Dead Man’s Corner.
As we waited, I got progressively more nervous but as I looked around, I could see loads of grown men who looked just as freaked out as I felt. It seemed an eternity ‘til the run started, but the last fifteen minutes were a whirlwind. Before I knew it, the men were thrusting their rolled up newspapers forward three times and chanting a prayer for luck and blessings from the tiny San Fermin statue at the start of the run. Moments later, they ran up past us to get their place to start the run.
People were stretching and pacing and then, BANG! The firework indicating the bulls had been released went off. A second later, BANG! Another firework went off to let us know all the bulls were out. Men were running past me but Buddha said, “Stay, stay….” As the bulls still hadn’t arrived. He warned me to look ahead and next to me, because people would fall over and it would be really bad news if I were to fall during the run and end up with a bull trampling me – or worse.
I tried to soak up what he was saying but all I could do was watch him jump up and down while he tried to spot he approaching beasts and finally he got a demonic grin on his face and said, “They’re here! Run!” I looked back at my fiancé Rory and we exchanged a look of absolute fear, then I heard them – the bulls.
Nine enormous, hairy, killing machines were right there on my left, and I didn’t need to be told to run, I was freakin’ running. I had no idea where Rors was, or Buddha, I was looking to the left one second, then in front the next and literally leaping over men lying face down on the ground. Guys were terrified, jumping up on the sides of the walls and scaling them up to the gutters and clinging on. I had no time to register that – I was just running my ass off.
As the bulls run into the stadium, they close giant gates off. This is to limit the number of people in the stadium, but most importantly, to prevent the bulls doubling back and taking people out. (On another day, a bull did just that and runners were forced to leap through the huge wooden fences to avoid being gored, but generally, climbing up on anything during a run is considered very poor form and cowardly.) Most people I’d spoken to hadn’t made it into the stadium and usually, if you do it means you have had a good run and gone at the right pace alongside or in front of the bulls – although these days, the runs are so crowded it is really not possible to run cleanly in front of the bulls.
I was prepared to not make it through the gates so was absolutely shocked when I saw them still open as we ran up to the stadium. I knew there was a steer a fair way behind me and that they would close the gates then open them again to let the steer through, so Rory, Budd and I regrouped at the gate, then ran through and into the stadium.
The crowd cheered like crazy as we ran in and the three of us were hugging each other and jumping up and down. It was the biggest adrenaline rush ever and one of the best things I have ever done. It was amazing, I was so nervous before the run but once I started actually going, I was so focused I didn’t have time to be nervous. The sound of the bulls’ hooves on the cobblestones and people breathing heavily and then the crowd exploding as we ran into the stadium are things burned into my memory forever.
